Wednesday, March 21, 2007


Who is the most retarded Stage Mom in America?

No, not Kathy Hilton. (I didn’t ask who the mom of the most retarded celebrity in America is.)

The most retarded Stage Mom in America is none other than Dina Lohan, mother of Lindsay, profiled here in today’s venerable New York Post. Check it out at:

After reading the entertainingly snide write-up, I just had to send a shout-out to Dina, Kathy, Lynne Spears, Jarnette Olsen (the twins’ mom)…and all the other mothers who pushed their babies into the limelight and then stood on the side, clapping delightedly as their lives turned into public nightmares:

You guys have screwed up.

In a major way.

In a way that cannot be blamed on poverty and lack of opportunity.

In a way that will be hard to undo.

Hey Deens, when the world looks at your daughter and “trashes” her, calling her a slut or drunk or bimbo, you might wanna stop and consider the validity of these charges and whether it is time to assess the role your own parenting (or lack thereof) has played in turning that adorable and gifted star of The Parent Trap into an utter train wreck.

As mothers, we have a daunting responsibility to nurture and protect and guide our children. Therefore, it is not in the best interest of your daughter when you act as her pimp. It is not in her best interest when you act like her best friend, going clubbing with her, drinking or hooking up, or even tottering around in her Jimmy Choos.

It is not in her best interest when you are such a media whore that you grab every opportunity to vogue for the cameras, flaunting some adolescent version of the Good Life as if you have discovered the meaning of life.

Tell me, you really think that sipping champagne in a limo is such a big freaking deal? Don't you think that at 44, it's more than a bit pathetic that you are so dazzled by the glitz and glitter of Hollywood? Don't you realize that we're all laughing at you?

It seems that as long as Linds is in the headlines – whether for flashing her privates or falling down drunk or getting into car crashes or showing up late and hung over to film sets – you believe that she is living – as you claim – the American Dream.

Wake up, Dinaleh.

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